My 1st Thursday Thirteen edition

13 items on my to do list for the month of February:
1. Celebrate my parents' 40th wedding anniversary.
My sister and I have made plans to make this day really special.

2. Send a birthday card by snail mail to a friend.
I still send birthday cards to my dear friends scattered all over the world. It is more personal and intimate that way.

3. Schedule a dentist appointment.
This is long overdue, really.

4. Get the wedding banns from my parish.
After 3 consecutive Sundays, I need to get them and return it to the church where I will get married.

5. Buy a V gift for my fiance.
No idea what to get him!

6. Find a suitable and affordable place to move in.
Apartment hunting with a limited budget is akin to looking for a needle in a hay stack!

7. Go for a pap smear test.
No explanation needed.

8. Hunt for wedding giveaways.
I have a few ideas in mind, it is just a matter of finding them at a good price.

9. Attend one of the seminars at the Edsa Shrine.
We are required to attend 2 seminars. The Christian Doctrine Seminar and the Marriage and Parenthood Seminar which are scheduled on Saturdays. But D works during that day so he has to spare some time to escape from school.

10. Apply for a certified true copy of birth certificate at NSO.
This document has to be issued 3 months before the actual wedding date. So we will probably apply for it towards the end of February.

11. Look for wedding shoes.
Need I say more?

12. Find the time to watch "There will be Blood" and "The Darjeeling Limited" during its limited release at the cinemas. I read the Daniel Day Lewis starrer will be shown exclusively at the Gateway Cineplex 10 on Feb. 13 while " The Darjeeling Limited" opens Feb. 6 at the Ayala Malls (Glorietta, Greenbelt and Trinoma).

13. Finally finish reading "A Thousand Splendid Suns" by Khaled Hosseini.
The second novel from the author of "Kite Runner" which I started reading last year but I always fall asleep when I read it, late at night after a long day!

Traditional saying

Most of us are familiar with this old wedding saying.

Something old, something new
Something borrowed, something blue
And a silver sixpence in her shoe.

I did a search for it and here's the history behind these famous lines. Each item in this poem represents a good-luck token for the bride. If she carries all of them on her wedding day, her marriage will be happy.

"Something old" symbolizes continuity with the bride's family and the past.
"Something new" means optimism and hope for the bride's new life ahead.
"Something borrowed" is usually an item from a happily married friend or family member, whose good fortune in marriage is supposed to carry over to the new bride.
As for the colorful item, "blue" has been connected to weddings for centuries. In ancient Rome, brides wore blue to symbolize love, modesty, and fidelity. Christianity has long dressed the Virgin Mary in blue, so purity was associated with the color. Before the late 19th century, blue was a popular color for wedding gowns, as evidenced in proverbs like, "Marry in blue, lover be true."
A sixpence is a coin that was minted in Britain from 1551 to 1967. It was made of silver and worth six pennies. So this wedding tradition is definitely English, and many sources say that it began in the Victorian era. A silver sixpence in the bride's shoe represents wealth and financial security. It may date back to a Scottish custom of a groom putting a silver coin under his foot for good luck. For optimum fortune, the sixpence should be in the left shoe. These days, a dime or a copper penny is sometimes substituted, and many companies sell keepsake sixpences for weddings.


As for me, well I haven't really put my head around it just yet with everything else that needs to be arranged before the big day. But if you ask me here's my (goofy) take on this saying:

Something old - that would be me at age 39! I guess I am way over the marrying age of 18. Although I heard lately in the news that that Church or some organization want to raise it to 21. They think that at 18 years of age, couples are too young, not yet emotionally mature and don't have means to support themselves. Therefore they end up living with the parents, all cramped together in some tiny apartment. This fuels a cohabitation existence where they depend on their family to provide everything for them. Free rent, free from paying utility bills, free use of household items, even get free chow since they don't 'have' to cook and no privacy!
Hmmm good point I guess but in our Asian society, there is no thing as being completely cut off from family once we reach 18, 21 or heck even 39. This is a good thing though I'm not disputing that fact. Oh dear, I digressed let's go back to the goofy part shall we?

Something new - I figure that would be my off white formal evening gown I am masquerading as a wedding gown. It isn't a traditional sparkling white wedding gown made of heavy fabric like duchess or shantung. No veil to cover my face and no long train to step on either. I can probably count the number of beads on the bodice of the evening gown. What is important for me is that I actually have something to wear instead of showing up in a white bed sheet wrapped around my petite frame. I can't pull off the statuesque Greek goddess look ala Angelina Jolie even in my dreams!

Something borrowed - I wanted to borrow my mother's pearl set but she told me it was bad luck to wear pearls on a wedding day. Something about it being the shape of tears so I might end up crying my eyes out instead of living in marital bliss. In the leaflet listing the norms for weddings I got from the Shrine, the guests must strictly follow the required dress code.
For ladies: attire must be with sleeves and a decent length;
sheer fabrics must be sufficiently lined.
For Gentlemen: t-shirt and denim pants are not allowed
Required Dress Code for Secondary Sponsors it must be with sleeves.
For Entourage Ladies: if wearing "tube" or spaghetti strap, must put on shawl.
My sister isn't married but I intend to just borrow her dangling silver earrings. I wonder if dangling earrings are allowed. The norms didn't mention anything about earrings, dangling or otherwise.


Something blue - well blue is my motif. From the invitations, the misalette to the color of the dress of my only entourage (my dear sister who acts as my wedding coordinator, my maid of honor, my secondary sponsor - in short dakilang alalay!) If I fail to find appropriate wedding shoes, I intend to just wear my favorite blue stiletto heels I bought in Singapore over a decade ago.

This is the first time I heard of the silver six pence part. Does a silver heart shaped cage arrhae with 13 pieces of coins inside count? I don't know how I will be able to walk properly if I had a silver six pence stuck in the left foot of my blue stilletto heels pictured above!

Spreading some linky love

I was tagged by Rach to spread this link loving in 2008

I have randomly selected 5 of you below to be tagged and I hope that you will similarly publish this post in your blog. You will have to tag 5 other bloggers and just keep adding on to the list. (Do not replace, just keep on adding! Yes we hope it will be a long list!)

It’s real easy! Tag others and see your Technorati Authority increase exponentially!

The benefits of Viral Linking:

- One of the fastest ways to see your technorati authority explode!
- Increase your Google PageRank fast
- Attract large volume of new traffic to your site
- Build your community
- Make new friends!

Add your blog url here …

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I am tagging Vanessa, Denden, Leah, Girlie, Em Dy

Eye to Eye

The last time I had my eyes checked was about 4 years ago. It is about time I had my eyes refracted to get rid of my big chunky eyeglasses.

I came across this Great Discovery: Zenni Optical. Their website sells various trendy prescription glasses online. Would you believe that the stylish eyeglasses pictured above is part of the Zenni Optical $8 Rx Glasses range of eye wear? They sell at affordable prices because they market their own manufactured frames directly to the customer. And the good news is that Zenni Optical sell internationally with a flat shipping and handling rate of only US$4.95 per order for any amount of eyeglasses you purchase online. This is truly the Best thing found: Zenni Optical.

Wedding banns

Yesterday, I 'tricked' D into hearing Mass at my local parish. A church I hardly visit because its ventilation system isn't really up to par. In other words, I risk straining my wrist from fanning myself constantly non stop or else I look like a wet monkey. Eh I'm alluding to the fact that I was born in the year of the monkey not that I have actually seen a monkey sweat, mind you!

I say tricked because there was only one reason for my physical presence at that church. Well other than hearing Mass, I wanted to check out our wedding banns. I had no idea where to look for it so I got to the Church early for the noon mass. I went roaming inside to check the bulletin boards. The one near the stairs was just loaded with some religious posters. I proceeded to the right side of the main entrance but there were just some leaflets with the mass schedules. As I was about to cross to the other side, the choir started singing so I took my seat at a pew. D was a bit late given that he was caught in the sudden downpour and it takes him 2 rides to get to my part of town.

After the Mass was over, I told D I wanted to check out the other bulletin board. He was holding my hand as we were negotiating our way through the crowd. Just as we approached, he suddenly pulled me away and nodded in my direction that yes our pictures were posted on the bulletin board. But he didn't want to see it up close.
This got me to wonder: (1) if he was embarrassed about the fact that we were formally announcing our upcoming wedding in public. (2) If he was conscious that people might recognize us from our pictures on the bulletin board. (3) If he was uncomfortable about getting married. Yes I know I overanalyze everything!
Me, I wanted to go and read it for myself because I barely caught a glimpse of it as he pulled me away towards the exit. I just shrugged and didn't insist. Later on when we were cuddling in front of the TV at my place watching some volleyball match, I asked D why he reacted that way in Church.


Guess what he told me?




He isn't photogenic in any of his pictures and he didn't want people to see how ruggedly handsome he really was in person. Ha ha ha Funny, silly guy but I love him to bits! I still intend to go back to my parish and read those banns with or without Mr (Non) Photogenic.

Let's talk about the M word

A dear friend of mine sent me this article via email. She told me it may or may not apply to my relationship but thought it would serve as a good reference for the future should issues crop up. I am sure they are bound to rear its ugly head sooner or later in the marriage. I decided to post an entry about it and include my comments in italics because I always have something to say about anything and everything. It is a slow news day after I've noticed a remarkable drop in opportunities coming my way. By opportunities I mean the paying kind and not opportunities in general.


TALKING HELPS YOU PREPARE FOR MARRIAGE
If you're engaged, you're likely busy with a plethora of logistical details - planning the wedding ceremony and reception, arranging the honeymoon, looking for a place to live. Amid all that busyness, however, take the time to talk as often as you can with your future spouse. The time you invest talking now should pay you great returns once you're married.

Here are some ways you can talk with each other to prepare yourselves well for marriage:
*** PRAY together, asking the Holy Spirit to help you begin a lifelong process of growing into unity mentally, physically, and spiritually. ***
We always hear Mass together on Sundays and if he doesn't have classes during the First Fridays of the month, he tags along. Several times D has openly mentioned to me what he specifically prays for in terms of our relationship and our marriage. He is deeply religious. I have to admit that he was the catalyst for my 'return' to hearing Mass every week.

*** ACCEPT the differences in the ways God has wired each of you, and seek to complement each other. Realize that no two people will think exactly alike, but that they can work to understand each other and build agreements that are mutually acceptable. Respect each other, and be willing to set aside your personal agendas in favor of God's will for you both as a team. ***
I always point out that we are really not compatible in many ways. He stresses that we are compatible as far as the important matters are concerned. I always support him whenever he talks about his work. He is my biggest supporter and cheers me on whenever I tend to underestimate myself.

*** TALK about money issues. Do you each have full access to information about the other's income and expenditures? Have you devised a joint budget? ***
I talked about my 2 year plan in a previous post. It was meant for us both to be more financially responsible. I am the 'kuripot' one. I always save up as much as possible which I guess is easy to do when my share of the bills in this present household is quite minimal. This is actually my biggest concern going into the marriage. With the declining dollar, the economic recession in the US affecting the global economy and the raising oil prices - I figure it is really going to be crunch time for everyone!

*** TALK about each other's family. Have you met your future in-laws and other members of your future spouse's family? Have you each shared your family histories, including both positive and negative information, and considered how that might affect your marriage? ***
Well I haven't met my future in laws and D's siblings. But D talks about them all the time. I was really surprised when D actually opened up about his family's history on our very first date. I was surprised he was very open about his past. In turn, I have shared many anecdotes about my own family with D as well as the eccentricities of my dysfunctional relatives. So he knows what he is getting himself into!

*** TALK about each other's friends. Have you met each other's closest friends? How do you expect to forge new friendships as a team with other married couples? How much time do you want to devote to friends, both separately and together? ***
My social circle is rather limited and confined to a select few friends whom I hardly see anyway. My bestest friends don't even live in this neck of the woods. I have met some of his friends. They seem decent and grounded enough so I don't anticipate any conflict with any of them. D and I are basically homebodies who rarely socialize but I understand the need to be more sociable and build new friendships along the way.

*** TALK about the talents God has given each of you. How would you like to use them to serve others, and how can your future spouse encourage you to do so? Remember that your marriage isn't just about your personal happiness; it's a vehicle through which God can work in awesome ways to bless others. ***
D has expressed several positive aspects about my talents. He is my most ardent fan. We have discussed how we intend to further enhance and hone our strengths and eliminate our weaknesses.

*** TALK about fidelity and commitment. Strive to approach your marriage out of purity, and pray for God's grace to help you do so. Don't live together before marriage; that decision erodes the love and respect God wants you to have for each other before your marriage even begins. Have you discussed how committed you are to following God and relying on His strength in your marriage? ***
Our commitment to each other is the number one factor of our relationship. We are deeply devoted to each other. He respects my person more than I ever thought it was possible. It took some time for me to truly understand this certain characteristic of D. But now I get what defines him as a person. His good moral values are his best traits.

*** TALK about sexuality. Can you both distinguish between love and lust? Do you know how your future spouse feels about his or her body, and what desires he or she has? What are some ways you can celebrate the love God has given you for each other through the wonderful gift of sex in marriage? ***
Ah well I won't elaborate on this aspect. Sex for me is a deeply personal matter which is best expressed within the confines of the bedroom or which ever room you want and not discussed for public consumption.

*** TALK about children. Do you both sense a calling to have children, and if so, how many? If you have children, how will you adjust your priorities to fully invest in them? Do you want to use birth control, and if so, what type? Will you both get a complete physical exam before marriage? ***
I have spent many hours on the phone thoroughly dissecting this topic to bits and pieces. His family have been hounding him that he should start a family right away while I have other ideas. I know I am not exactly in the position to bid my time, I am no longer a spring chicken so to speak. I like to say that making babies is the easy part, raising them is another matter. I admit we still have to talk more about this subject matter.

*** TALK about faith. Have you fully shared with your future spouse why your faith is important to you, and how you've experienced God working in your life? Where will you attend church? Will you pray together regularly? How will you support each other's spiritual growth and ministry efforts? ***
I told D the real reason why I stayed away from Church for many years. He understood and didn't judge me for it. Due to his positive influence, my spirituality has increase ten fold and I am certain it will continue to strive in the years to come.

Friday's Feast
Appetizer
How many times per day do you usually laugh?
Oh a whole lot of times, I don't count them I just laugh or in my case, I giggle

Soup
What do your sunglasses look like?
It resembles a RayBan. Yeah I know it is really out of style but as long as it serves its purpose, I'm game.


Salad
You win a free trip to anywhere on your continent, but you have to travel by train. Where do you go?
Oh I love train rides. I would go explore the fascinating nation of Cambodia.


Main Course
Name one thing you consider a great quality about living in your town/city.
It is centrally located. You can find good shopping areas, hospitals, close proximity to good schools and everything else in between.


Dessert
If the sky could be another color, what color do you think would look best?
All the varying shades of orange!

Happiness is ...(well for me anyway!)

... Finding a pair of shoes that fits my tiny feet, perfectly.

I feel like Cinderella after she got her glass slippers back from Prince Charming. Now I'm hoping I can find the perfect wedding shoes to marry my own Prince Charming so I can cross that item off my really really long list of items to buy!